Me and movies, hmm... I'm that person who has seen a million movies, but who hasn't seen any of the biggies. I've never seen Lord of the Rings, or Star Wars, or any of the James Bond movies. I don't mind, I've never had a particular urge to watch any of these. The only time I think that maybe I'm missing out on something is when I meet a guy and we do the getting to know you chat and then I hear the familiar, "Oh, jesus, you have seen nothing"!
When it comes to movies, I like them to be the way I like everything else in life - full of meaning and straight from the heart. I don't particularly like happy endings either, that's the pessimist in me!
"I'm just a fucked up girl who's looking for her own piece of mind. Don't assign me yours." - Clementine, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. My favourite movie, and my favourite line from it.
I've always felt, in relationships, that people needed me. They weren't with me because when they pictured their life in twenty years, I was in it. It was never because curling up beside me in bed was like coming home. I was always just needed. One day, I realised being needed and being wanted, well, they're not same. When you're wanted, properly wanted, it doesn't matter if you're needed or not. And that's what I need, but more importantly, what I want.
I can't be the girl who fixes what others have broken before me. I can't promise forever. I can't hold anyone else's happiness in the palm of my hand. All I can give is me, and now.
If you haven't seen this movie, I'm not going to ruin it for you. I'm just going to suggest that you do watch it. I like it because for me, it is true love. Usually, in movies, two people meet and date and everything is perfect, and bright, and shiny. Love isn't like that. Clementine isn't like that. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless mind isn't like that. It's real. It's full of emotion. It is perfect, but in an entirely different, and I think, more wonderful way.
"I don't see anything I don't like about you."
"But you will. You will, and I'll get bored with you and feel trapped, because that's what happens with me."